Stockbridge would normally be nightmare parking territory for the picky operator of an LWB van but I slid easily into a resident’s bay opposite 2 Children, one of the many, many upmarket-looking coffee outlets in the area and parked untouchably because it was Sunday.
One hears a lot about the supposed superiority of certain areas of Edinburgh from certain Edinburgh acquaintances and 2 Children does seem to be from a better, brighter future. The café is like the interior of a vast spaceship with a ribbed ceiling and open facade in the cavernous docking bay, alien plantlife on the walls and a whole new level of futuristic lighting technology. Giant teleportation stations hang from the ceiling ready to beam you to another space quadrant or perhaps just Morningside. On the way to the human bodily waste disposal units there are comfortable individual darkened carrels for suspended animation. The ship’s stylish human avatars do not seem to operate by terrestrial café rules: I could have had brunch at earth time 16.21 as I briefly toyed with doing. Very good coffee came preternaturally fast (teleported) and was followed by a jalapeno cheese scone of such fantastic taste and quality that the ship’s mainframe AI must have been involved. Prices were the norm for Stockbridge in the early 21st Century and utterly acceptable for this quality. The only compromise in 2 Children seems to be the café tables and chairs, which have been sourced from the Jupiter branch of space-IKEA. I managed to find an Earth-gravity space-banquette to recline upon where from I looked out into void and kept an eye on the van through the huge glass viewing windows of the bridge.
Here, the vastness of the galaxy, another coffee and the many varied life-forms of Stockbridge 2025 passing on Raeburn Place moved me to verse for your literary or otherwise pleasure. Before me lay;
The latest iPhones
and Residents’ Parking Zones
of Stockbridge.
The Chocolate Labs
and utility-workwear Caps
of Stockbridge.
The low-profile Nikes
and 4-grand eBikes
of Stockbridge.
The MacBook Airs
and Designer eye-wears
of Stockbridge...
Poetry is a bit more problematic to pull off than one imagines so I think I will leave it there. Suffice to say that I have seen the space-café future and it is most acceptable. I can thoroughly recommend 2 Children to Picky Intergalactic travellers or even just the currently terrestrial dwellers of Scotland.
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